I’m Done Pretending 🩸
I bleed. It's exhausting. But my body is not the problem.
Something shifted today. It occurred to me that I don’t want to menstruate anymore. But after saying this I realized the truth: the problem is not my body, the problem is all of us.
I’m absolutely weary of playing along with the cultural taboos about female bodies. This bullsh*t is old and deep and needs to end.
I spend 1/4 of my life in a state of exhaustion and pain while trying to show up for work, life, and other people as if what I’m experiencing isn’t happening.
Hormone-induced insomnia is exhausting but society-induced pretending is more exhausting. The majority of female bodies bleed. This is part of the female reproductive system miracle that made your life possible. All of human life possible. So if we value human life why aren’t we talking about paid menstrual leave so that the half of humanity that bleeds can do so in peace & rest for a few days while their life force drains out of them and their body does its miraculous monthly cleanse and reset?
Stop pretending that normal bodily functions are a problem.
Stop pretending that female bodies are weak.
Stop pretending that productivity is the point of human existence.
Bring back the red tent. Bring back rest. Bring back sanity.
We are weary of playing along with the idea that male bodies are normal and female bodies are a problem.
My body is not a problem. On the rare months that I can drop the routine of keeping up with everything and simply rest while bleeding I experience pain, insomnia, diarrhea, fatigue, a headache…and I also drop into liminal space, deep wisdom, vision, and potent truth-telling.
While bleeding I can access clarity in a way that simply isn’t available the rest of the month. Self-censorship and being “nice” gets eclipsed by the power of truth and for a few days I have an uncommon ability to tell it like it is.
This is why around the world, for ages, women and girls have been shamed for having periods. It's why women today are shamed for talking about periods or taking time to rest when they're bleeding.
Patriarchy doesn’t like women being in their power.
I'm thinking of Rosa Parks today.
Because at some point you're too tired to play the game.
"...and I also drop into liminal space, deep wisdom, vision, and potent truth-telling. While bleeding I can access clarity in a way that simply isn’t available the rest of the month. Self-censorship and being “nice” gets eclipsed by the power of truth and for a few days I have an uncommon ability to tell it like it is." What if... what if we didn't grow up hiding ... what if we grew up honoring and respecting the sacredness of this time? What if we respected that time as a time of visioning and rest? How would that change society as a whole? I love the call to stop pretending... and the simple reality... my body is not a problem <3
It's been a long while since I've bled, my fertile years literally cut short by the surgeon's knife which I gratefully traded for relief; relief from shortened cycles but lengthened bleeding, pain, and anemia, all due to large fibrous tumors in my uterus. I resisted for years trying many remedies but to no avail. I thought I would enter a long process of grieving afterward. I was wrong. I didn't miss my moon-time at all or the collective camaraderie with other women. Not bleeding was a relief. I reveled in the freedom and gradually regained my health. I wear white underwear again!